Pregnancy isn’t glamorous

Pregnancy has taught me a lot.

I’m writing this post not to freak anyone out, but rather to shed light on the not so glowing realities of pregnancy. For starters, I have learned that the fun parts of it are glamourized and perhaps overemphasized compared to the gross and sometimes depressing parts. Sure, if you’re lucky, your skin will glow… But you have just as good of a chance of that as you do having high school style breakouts. And maybe your sex drive will increase and you’ll have the best sex of your life during this time… Or maybe, you’ll have zero sex drive whatsoever, wonder how you ever even got yourself in the mood to make this baby in the first place, and spend most of your showers crying, thinking that you’ll never feel normal again. Some women will want to sleep their days away, while the lucky few feel energized and ready to take on the world (with fetus in tow). For every great experience, there’s an equally shitty one.

I have created a list of disheartening realizations from my personal experience of pregnancy thus far.

  • Sometimes your boobs don’t end up growing as much as you’re 16 year old self had hoped for! I was banking on a full C cups, but that dream is long gone.
  • No one warns you about the discharge that comes out of your body during this time. Trust me, it’s shocking, and awkward.
  • Three quarters of your pregnancy you spend looking and feeling bloated.
  • After a certain point, you can no longer see your vagina. And trust me, bending over to take a look at it will cause you to wonder if you’re about to pass out. Lady-scaping goes out the window, and you just pray that whatever kind of Helen Keller approach you’re taking is good enough. Not great. Just good enough.
  • A slight incline in the road will make you feel like you’re scaling a mountain.
  • Three words: No. Reason. Tears. Those will come and go as they please.
  • Evening plans are extremely hard to follow through on. Even with the best of intentions you might have to bail on your friends because you’re simply too tired to be social.
  • Pregnancy brain is a real thing. You’ll forget stuff, get stuck on the simplest words, and basically have moments of feeling pretty dumb.
  • Somedays will be harder than others. Whether it’s from mood swings, fading energy, or general feelings of apathy. These days will pass, and better ones will come, however, if you’re really struggling for a while, don’t be ashamed to seek out help.
  • Gorging in the third trimester is basically asking to throw up a little in your mouth. Don’t do it.
  • Gas. Both ends. Bad enough to kill a small animal.
  • Sometimes the people you love the most, and need the most at this time, will annoy you to no end for reasons that would have never annoyed you in the past.

But then all it takes is one strong movement from within your belly, and suddenly every shitty experience you’ve dealt with so far disappears. When I see my belly wobbling from my baby’s kicks, I am filled with gratitude for what my body is capable of doing. I know that not everyone has it as easy as me, and I know there are so many women out there desperate to get pregnant, or mourning the loss of an unborn baby, or accepting the fact that pregnancy is not in their future. I’m grateful for this child, and my body, and my every so loving (and patient) husband, even on the crappiest, unsexiest, and most bloated of days.

Have you been surprised by what your pregnancy has thrown at you? Share in the comments!

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